lolsob forever

Actual Headline: Obama administration warns the left: You will not like our budget.

Actual Lede: "Top White House officials are warning liberal and labor leaders to brace themselves for President Obama’s budget proposal."

Actual Quote: "Obama staffers sought to present their budget plan as a glass half full."

So, you know, if you're one of the millions of USians who are suffering from "food insecurity" because many of the social programs that constitute our jury-rigged social safety net are being defunded, don't think of it as your belly being half-empty; think of it as your belly being half-full!

In totally unrelated news, President Obama will accept the Democratic nomination for president at Bank of America stadium this year. Perfect. That is definitely the perfect place and will not look at all comprehensively clueless.